All Halloween wants to do is give you a big hug you with that knife.

I will forever be grateful that when my girls were little, they were pretty easy. I had friends who seemed like their kids were always keeping them on their toes with mischievous doings. I'm sure other people have a lot of stories but the best one I can think of was when Grace was a baby and smeared poop all over her crib and walls. This week, I finally had one of those moments that I'm sure most parents have when their kids are toddler. One of my children called me at school last Monday to tell me that the cat had opened my bedside table drawer "too far" and a bottle of nail polish had fallen and spilled on the carpet. I'm sure right now you are thinking, "How did the cat open the drawer?" That is you should be thinking and what I immediately thought. We had a cat once that could open our front door so I could see the possibility was there but something with this story that wasn't sitting right with me. Oh, and while I'm trying to process how the cat opened the draw I'm also thinking, "There is @#$@# nail polish on my carpet!" I tell this child who called that I'm not buying this "cat" story at all. She continues to stick to her story. Fortunately school was over so I get ready to go home. On my way home, I get a text from this child admitting that it wasn't the cat, it was her and she is sorry she lied. Hmmm...really? It wasn't the cat, eh? So basically replace "cat" with "girl" and you get the full story. I walk into a house that reeks of nail polish and in the middle of my bedroom floor an entire bottle of blue nail polish has been emptied. I swore and got to work. Due to my amazing cleaning skills and the magic of acetone, I was able to get most of the stain out. I can't fault this child too much. I remember being terrified of getting in trouble when I was her age. I was playing with an old TV antenna when I was about 7 and bent it. I'm sure it was garbage but I didn't know that and all I could think of was the horrible trouble would get into if anyone found out about it. So I hid it in our unfinished basement and got to work worrying about being found out. I was really good at worrying. I think it was eventually found and probably thrown away. Not like you could hide a huge blue stain in the middle of the floor but I probably would have tried to think up some sort of story. I might not have been smart enough to blame it on the cat.

Smooth operator
Hanna went to her third school dance after school today. This is her THIRD and she had yet to dance with an actual boy. Today the curse was broken and a real boy asked her to dance. She told me she didn't like this boy but said yes to be nice. She was also mortified that it was a slow dance. As they were dancing a couple of ninth graders dancing nearby made fun of them and told Hanna and her real boy that, "They danced like sevies." I had to explain to Ryan that this is a slang term for seventh graders. Hanna's partner then said to her, "Can I pull you closer?" Oh man! This made me laugh out loud! Can I pull you closer? Good one buddy. Doesn't he know you need to be a Bible, Book of Mormon and dictionary apart? Hanna told him that she was fine as they were. I thought it was interesting when we came home and told this story to Ryan. He immediately sympathized with the boy, while Hanna and I had been mocking him mercilessly. Girls are so cruel.

Thank you Buddah!
Remember when I blogged a few years about about not getting "Booed" at Halloween? Of course you don't. On Saturday we were "Booed"(now I just wish people would leave us alone because I'm older and lazier). The girls weren't home but saw the treats later. Grace asked where the treats were from. I said, "We got booed." Grace replied, "Buddah brought it?" Oh sweet Grace. Yes, Buddah brought us pumpkin cookies. Praise Buddah!

"Watch out! Halloween is trying to hug you with that knife!"
Ryan and I complain to each other that neither appreciates how funny the other is. This past weekend we watched a lot of old horror movies on Netflix and I have to admit Ryan has a funny bit. He calls Michael Myers "Halloween". Then makes comments the entire movie like, "Look behind you! Halloween is going to get stabby with that knife!" I find this really funny and makes watching horror movies much more bearable.
Here are our costumes. I went all out with Grace's "The Birds" costume. I don't think her classmates appreciated it. What? Your 10 year old hasn't seen "The Birds"? For shame.



Mrs. Iverson? Is that you?
I had to give Shari a hard time today about her costume. I'm not freaked out by clowns unless they are evil clowns but it was the doll that got to me. We also had to laugh when she came out to recess with her "circle clown" (Holiday gas station) drink cup. Clown all the way! I loves me some Shari but that doll has gots to go.

I accept the challenge of Sparkle Fairy!

I better blog or I'm going to get a call from my dad asking me what my problem is. It's weird how a a couple of weeks will go by where I think I have nothing at all to talk about and then the next week is full of excitement. This week was one of those weeks.

On Wednesday it snowed for the first time. This was my morning view from my classroom. Fortunately, it didn't last long but we've yet to get nice weather back. I made a joke to Ryan about it signaling the time to up my Prozac but seriously, I don't like winter. I tell Ryan I want to take up skiing so that the I will associate the snow with something good. He says skiing is a hobby for the rich. I say, that's why I went back to work, so we could buy pre-shredded cheese and take up skiing.

That night Ryan carved one of his fantastic pumpkins. It took him three hours but I like to think of it as him keeping up his la-dee-da arty skills. We didn't pay thousands of dollars for nothing. If we win the contest he's entering, we'll get a $25 gift card!

On Thursday, Grace won a bike at school. We have a reading incentive program that a local car dealership sponsors and Grace's name was drawn to win a bike. The other student who won was in my class so there was a lot of cheering coming from my classroom. I told my class that the Van Fleets never win anything so this is a really big deal. Because Grace won, she got to lead our school Halloween parade. Very exciting.
Grace got a BMX bike to round out her bike collection. I see some Napoleon Dynamite ramp building in our future.

Grand marshal of the Halloween parade. Our principal is the wizard. He's great.

Friday was Halloween at school and I have to admit it's not my favourite holiday. Last year I had a total anxiety attack during the school parade. Let me set this up for you. Our school has approximately 1200 students. For the Halloween parade, most of their parents and quite a few grandparents show up. We walk our classes through all 36 classrooms and then we go into the double gym that is full of chairs. Not so fun for someone who has social anxiety. This year I felt a lot better about things. Maybe it's the brain medicine working or just being more comfortable with my job but I would say this Halloween was much better than the last. I asked one of the little fairies in my class if she'd like to walk holding my hand and we had a good time together. See, people can change when they are as old as I am. Tonight Ryan is out with Grace and it's pouring rain. I haven't had one kid at the door. Hanna is with her school friends. The first year Hanna and Grace haven't gone together. I guess I need to get used to that.

Grace and I made our skirts. Well, Hanna mostly made mine. I love that they can do things for me now. Grace is a monarch butterfly and I'm a "sparkle" fairy. I had to come up with a name when my class asked me what kind of fairy I was.

Hanna, being Hanna during the parade. She's the life of the party, or so she thinks.

Me and my sweet fairy helper.

"For lucky best wash, use Sparkle Fairy!"

The first grade team all dressed up as fairies. Shari (purple wig) says I owe her lunch because of it. First grade is #1!

What? You didn't make your cat a matching costume? Well that just makes you weird. HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Write damnit!

Working is definitely cutting into my blogging time and I really think I don't feel as good when I don't write. So I'm writing on my laptop while I watch the season finale of Mad Men. Look at me, multitasking! Work is work. I feel a lot like I did when I first became a mom to a colicky baby girl, overwhelmed. I don't think I'll ever love teaching as much as I love Hanna but I'm hoping that I learn to love it in a different way. I taught a lesson today on the sense of sight and I had one of those teaching moments where I felt like they might actually be learning something and having fun doing it. The cool thing is, almost like your own children, first graders love their teachers even when you maybe aren't exactly loving them. We had a good Halloween but I have to admit I'd rather have my eyes poked out than parade in and out of all 30+ classrooms, parent packed hallways and gym in my Jack Sparrow costume. I'm sure as the years go on I'll get more used to it or I'll just keep going to my happy place.

Happy Halloween!

Grace brought a fun surprise home from school this week, a goldfish! No warning, nothing, just came into my room after school with a goldfish in a bag. Apparently all the kids got one. I won't go into how many ways I think this is wrong but we have the damn goldfish so we are going to take care of it. I secretly hoped it would die in the night. Yep I'm that kind of heartless person, but it lived. I went to Walmart the next morning, got it an aquarium and some food and Kelly seems to be adjusting well to life in our home. I'm kind of digging it now because the kids get a pet they can take care of and I'm not emotionally attached to it. Unfortunately, Ryan and the kids are attached to Kelly so I hope she plans to live for a while.

Saturday night Ryan and I went to a party for the opening of our stylist's salon. That's right, Ryan goes to the same stylist Karen and I got to. I've been going to Chad for about 3 years now. It was after Evie was born and I was feeling the urge to cut all my hair off. Karen took me with her to Chad and he cut my hair all off without an appointment. Plus, it looked great. I tried to break away from Chad when gas was up to $4/gallon and I was driving from Santaquin to Sugarhouse but no one could compare. I heart the Chad. Chad is the only person who has ever cut Ryan's hair where Ryan didn't feel mad after. I think if Ryan were gay, which he isn't, he and Chad would make a nice couple. So if you're looking for a great stylist, check out Chad at bspace salon.

Halloween

The weather was great on Halloween this year and the kids experienced the rare treat of not having to wear a coat over your costume. Hanna was a native Hawaiian princess and Grace was Queen Elizabeth I.



Grace is commanding Hanna. Imperialism in practice.


This is my new look. I'm going to see if they can sew this $15 wig to my head. It looks so natural.

Sort of Love Thy Neighbor

A couple of nights ago we got our first neighbor gift. Remember it's only the first week in December but I guess some people are super on top of things like that. I dread the neighbor gift frenzy every year. First I stress about what I'm going to do and then I stress about who to give them to or who will give them to us. Oh and I forgot to add that there is also the money factor. As in this can cost a butt-load of money! In previous years I have gone the baking route (too much enery/time), the homemade ornament route (time was also a factor here) and the bought candy route ($$$). So this year I'm trying to think of a way to do it without exerting much energy, time or money. Really the only way to do that is to not do anything at all and that will send me into a bout of anxiety that I don't even want to think about. Why is it that I'm 32 years old and I still care what people think of me? That's another post though. I realize it's got to be done so I will just suck it up and do it. That's the Christmas spirit right? I usually make a list of people I actually like, actual neighbors, people who always give us something and then my back up list of people I will give to only if they give us something. This can get pretty lengthy but judging by the fact that no one "Ghosted" our family on Halloween I'm thinking we aren't going to receive that many. Oh I feel a tangent coming on... Yes that is right, our family was not "Ghosted" on Halloween. If you are unaware of what that is I will tell you. Someone brings over candy and a piece of paper with poem on it that basically tells you that you have to give another family the same thing. It's basically a Halloween chain letter and if you break it by not giving out more candy, the Halloween Gods will frown upon you. I do know some people who break this chain (Karen) and it was not a pretty sight. I think her kids only got Smarties and Tootsie rolls that year. The point is no one did this to our house. This was the first year we'd been ignored and I don't know why. Maybe personal tragedies make people uncomfortable and they thought we wouldn't want to be bothered with some neighborly kindness. Regardless of this I will purchase and pass out neighbor gifts this year. I want to be liked as much as the next person and if buying their friendship is the only way to do it, then by golly I will! On a side note we just got an invitation to a neighborhood party. While I'd rather have my eyes poked out with a hot poker I will most likely go because deep down inside I'm thinking "They like me! They really really like me!"

Here is a picture of Grace doing her model pose by the Christmas tree.