Karen Hates Cats

So I thought this t-shirt would be perfect for her. Although I think she doesn't mind kittens as long as they aren't in her car or window well.

Threadless Sale

If your interested in purchasing a t-shirt the average Joe won't be wearing, check out Threadless T-Shirts. I bought Ryan this one for his birthday. All their t-shirts are on sale for $10 until June 3rd and shipping is only $5.95.

Trampoline

It's a slow news week around here but we did purchase a trampoline for Hanna's 8th birthday. Her birthday isn't until the 4th of June but we wanted it up for her party. So here it is in it's enormity.



Hanna is channelling the spirit of Steve Martin. Wait he's not dead.

Our Daughter a Genius?

Hanna wanted me to read a poem she'd written in her journal yesterday. I was so tired from weekend activities and then church that I quickly read the poem titled "Butterfly" and told her it was great. When Ryan got home that night I told him he should read this poem Hanna had written. He reads it and then says,"Either our daughter is a genius or this poem was plagiarized." I grab the poem from him and read it again, this time actually paying attention. He was right! This poem was awesome and if Hanna did actually write it we are dealing with some sort of poetic prodigy. I know my child pretty well and I found it hard to believe she wrote the line "Spread your tender paper wings, powdered all over." But the word that really had me convinced this was not written by our daughter was "cabbages". Where in the world would she come into contact with this word since I don't think a cabbage has ever been in our house. This morning I asked her about the poem and she then remembered she'd copied it off the poem wall in her classroom. I have to admit I was pretty excited in that minute I thought I was raising the next Emily Dickinson.

Had to Post This

So I'm driving to the school today with a friend who's name starts with K. She said she drove by the bunnies yesterday and thought it would be funny if we came at night and arranged them so it looked like they were "humping". I almost peed my pants laughing. When she says things like this, which she does quite often, I always wish other's could hear because I'm sure they would fall over in shock. She is in the Primary Presidency you know! We decided we had better not but concluded that teenagers these days lack imagination.

Some House Photos

I thought our yard was looking especially good after a nice rain so I took a few photos. Someday this yard is going to be bitchin but it's a slow process when you do everything by hand. I forgot the backyard which because we have a small forest back there shading it, the grass always looks better. Remember if you click on the photos they will magically become bigger. Oh and BTW Hanna was student of the month!

The south part of the front yard. Karen said my pots on the porch are too small. Next years project.


Our view from my rocking chair on the front porch. Ryan sits on it and yells at kids. ;)


Evie's memorial garden. We just planted everything this spring.

These Scare the Bejesus Out of Me

I pass these every day when I take the girls to school. They were put up around easter and are still there looking much worse for the wear. It now looks like the man rabbit on the bench is either dead or drunk and the wife rabbit is silently weeping about it. I've "spookied" up the photos a bit because this is what they would look like in my dreams.

Piano Recital

Hanna had her second piano recital on Friday. She's been taking piano since September and is doing very well. She played "I'm Trying To Be Like Jesus" which was her choice. She only made a mistake because she had to turn her own page and the page wouldn't stay open. We were very proud.

Al Gore Told Me To

Ryan and I are toying with the idea of trading in the Dodge Grand Caravan and buying a hybrid. I'm leaning toward the Toyota Prius but we are still in the rudimentary stages of looking. I love the van for it's "biggness" and luxury items like the DVD player. It is pretty much the ultimate touring vehicle plus since we have the stow and go seats we can fit a sheet of plywood in the back. We've also slept in it on a few occasions. If it weren't for the gas I would keep it. Gas is now over $3/gallon and I have a feeling it's only going to get worse. So I want to hear your opinions on what we should do. BTW if money were no issue I would keep the van and get the Prius for everyday driving.

Five Characteristics Of Highly Effective Serial Killers

Ryan saw a news story the other day that featured a new serial killer named Wayne. We have had this conversation before in our lives but we wondered again if my family was at high risk for a serial killer. My Dad's first name is Wayne and my brother is Monti Wayne. I guess I'm past worrying about my dad since he is "older" and doesn't have a lot of opportunity to kill but my brother is still young. I guess only time will tell. I Googled "serial killers named wayne" and this article that came up was interesting.

Rising to the top of one's profession need not be a mysterious process, particularly for serial killers. Here are five formula ingredients:

Be male. The ERA is dead, so female serial killers earn only 80% of the salary of their male counterparts. Perhaps that's why so few of our young girls aspire to be serial killers. It's going to take many a Charlize Theron to change the equation, and even then, they'll have to be prostitutes first.

Be an Eagle Scout. A disproportionate number of serial killers were Eagle Scouts. The key lessons of scouting, like tying knots and hiding things in the woods, may need to be rethought. Merit badges for self-loathing homophobia are probably fine.

Be a baker. It may be an urban legend, but a lot of serial killers seem to be bakers. That must be why the Cinnabon job application asks how many people you've killed. Three or more qualifies you for serial killer status, but it also means Cinnabon won't included you in their "Bon Health Care Plan."

Be named "Wayne." John Wayne Gacy. Wayne Williams. Wayne Alan Ford. Patrick Wayne Kearney. Does naming your child "Wayne" increase his likelihood of becoming a serial killer? We'll soon find out, as thousands of Gretzky-inspired Canadians named Wayne are just now entering their prime killing years. The big question is which is the more dominant characteristic -- the killer inherent in Waynes, or the lack of ambition in Canadians?

Be American. The U.S. has lost its manufacturing base and its technology jobs are following suit, but we still lead the world in serial killer production. The FBI estimates that 85% of the world's serial killers live in the U.S., despite the country's only accounting for 5% of the world's population. Of course, we also have the most Cinnabon franchises, so it all kind of makes sense.

Mild mannered jr. high teacher?



Or potential serial killer?

So Very Sad Songs

I got this list of Exquistely Sad Songs off Dooce and I did get melancholy listening to many of them. I still listen to "Nothing Compares To You" often and it always brings me back to a summer in high school. I remember driving around Magrath in my dad's ford truck getting emotional listening to it. Beck's "Lost Cause" is also one that gets me down. Ahh "Shilo", where do I start? I was pretty much raised on Neil Diamond and listening to him brings back a lot of memories. I was never neglected to the point of having to hang out with an imaginary friend but Shilo is a cool name for one. I remember "Brick" by Ben Folds Five got a lot of airtime on local radio. I wonder if many realised it was about taking his girlfriend to get an abortion? Now that's depressing. I'm sure some of you know this but I like The Smiths just a little and "I Know It's Over" was listened to many a time by teenage me. In fact it was on a "sleep tape" I made that I went to sleep to almost every night in high school. I also listened to this song a lot thinking about unrequited high school love. The Beatles "Eleanor Rigby" leaves me feeling close to suicidal everytime I happen to hear it. I'd love to hear some of your "sad songs" and I'm going to think about more of mine.

A Little Grace

Grace had a fieldtrip a month or so ago and I just got the photos off the camera so I thought I'd share. They went to the Monte L. Bean Museum on BYU campus. They saw a reptile show and then we just wandered around the museum. We go there a lot as a family but we've never caught the reptile show before.

A little worried about the snake.


Scary stuffed lions!

Riding the bus home.

I Had No Idea

I asked my friend Amanda if I could write a blog about her Dad's involvement in Civil War re-enactment and she said I could. I first found out about the whole thing when Amanda talked at a church function on traditions. She said that before she got married her dad liked them to take photos with their fiance both in Civil War dress. I'm sure this came as a shock to the unsuspecting fiance. I thought it was cool though. So here are some pictures of Amanda, her husband Mark and her Dad. The description of the photos are Amanda's words.


Here is the begining of it all. This is Dad and Mom in College before they were married. Dad developed a love for the Civil War when he was about 14 and then when he went to Dental School in Kentucky it just fed it. He took and intrest in the Medical part of the War and plays the Doctor and Dentist when Re-enacting. Mom always watched from a distance and supported him and I played his assistant. It was good times with him! This is his passion.


This is a picture of my Dad taken last fall at a re-enactment. The camera used to take this picture was an original that dates back to the early 1800's.


Mark playing Medical Surgeon and I am his assistant. Love the fake blood!


Mark and I on the grounds of an old Civil War home.

Mundane Life Stuff

I've been thinking about going back to work for some time now. Actually I started to think about it seriously last year this time and then BAM! got pregnant. We all know how that turned out so once again I'm back on the work wagon. I was at a PTA luncheon two weeks ago and sat next to the Principal. I overcame my social anxiety for a few moments and asked him about re-entering the workforce. We chatted for a bit and he invited me to come talk to him and go over my resume. I went in today and we had a nice little chat about what I need to do to recertify. I thought it went well and he also offered to write me a letter of recommendation. I found out that if I do get the job I want, which is part time kindergarten, I would make (Drum roll please) $15,000! Don't worry the money won't change me. I'll still be the same down-to-earth person I've always been. So my plan is to take district classes this summer, get half the licensure points I need and then finish the rest next summer. The plan being to start looking for a job next summer. He said 1/2 time kindergarten positions are hard to fill because most people want full-time. So maybe I've found my niche. I'll just keep subbing next school year and hopefully get my name out there. I'll start shopping for power suits now.

I Don't Like Some People

I've had a few neighborhood things happen recently that have left a bad taste in my mouth. I won't go into details since this blog isn't private (just not advertised to many) and I certainly don't need any more letters showing up at my door. It has made me think that some people are not as nice as they claim to be and that people like to talk about other people. Especially when it makes the talked about person look bad and the talkee look good. I realised a few things about me also. That I need to not be so trusting and that I need to keep my mouth shut. I also learned that what people say is not necessarily what they mean. If they say "If there is anything you ever need, just let me know." They might really mean, "I will help you out but then I will complain about it to others." I've had/have some good friends in my life who I felt comfortable asking favours from but apparently those kind of friends are rare and I should not expect everyone to be that way. The lesson learned has been a valuable one really. I will stay as univolved with other neighborhood women as I can and I will only trust a precious few. Oh and that some people are not as Christian as they would like you to think.

I thought about sending this card out annonymously to a couple of women. Maybe it would be just thing they need to take that final step toward medication.

Letting The Onion Write My Blog

This made me chuckle. Click on headline and see if you can figure out what made me laugh. It's really tricky.

Pentacle Allowed On Veterans' Tombstones

My House Stinks

I seriously wonder if I am losing my mind? I put eggs on the stove to boil yesterday and then left the house for four hours. I came home to a house fill with stinky egg smoke that has settled into everything we own. We are having to wash everything. I don't know if you've ever had to wash every washable thing in your house but it's a freakin big job. I think we are on load 732 and are only about halfway done. Luckily (ha) it was nice yesterday and today so we've been able to leave all the windows open. We are also cleaning every surface of our house with heavy duty magic cleaner. I do think the smell is slowly dissipating and I'm hoping it will be gone for good. I forgot to mention that one of the eggs exploded which I found kind of fascinating but it was not so fascinating when I was cleaning it off the ceiling. Life.