Go Faster! Work Harder!

I joined Gold's gym this fall for two reasons. 1) I was on the edge a nervous breakdown and my therapist and I thought exercise would help. 2) I needed to drop a few pounds since I had been pregnant for 5 months. Not the happiest reasons to join a gym but so far it's been a good thing. I go with my friend Karen who has had five children and actually weighs less than she did when she was first married. She looks fabulous and eats whatever she wants which she admits is mostly crap. Did I mention I hate her? Oh Kar-kar I'm just kidding. You know I love you. Anyway we go to the gym and we're good work out partners. I am motivated to get there and Karen is motivated to keep going when I want to give up and go eat cinnamon and sugar pretzels at Sam's Club. I actually like the feeling I get from working out and it helps keep me off antidepressants. I'm also pretty vain, sadly, and like the idea of being thin. Recently I've been taking more classes at the gym because, like I mentioned before, I have a motivation problem and need someone to yell slogans at me to keep me going. What I don't need is any interaction with anyone else in the class. I go there to work out, not to make friends. I don't want or need to high five the other people in the class and I sure as hell don't want to partner up with a complete stranger. For this reason I have been liking the cycle class I take. The room is dark so no one can see me making those ugly workout faces and interacting with others is non-existent. The teacher yells great slogans at us and the music is loud with a strong beat. I sweat like I have never sweated before and most days I feel like I'm on the verge of throwing up partway through the class. I like it because I feel like I've accomplished something and pushed myself. Supposedly in this class you could burn up to 900 calories. Now on to my observation about aerobics teachers at gyms. I've yet to have one who looks super in shape or is "skinny". Doesn't it seem odd that someone who works out for a living would not be in awesome shape? I'm fascinated by this and often spend part of the class wondering what this person eats to undo all that exercise. Then I start to worry that this is all a big scam and I'm never going to be in the shape I hope for. I keep on keeping on though and hopefully I will see the results I would like to see someday. I also hope I'm setting a good example for my girls and they will see that being active is a good thing. Still I wish that I had the metabolism I did when I was 17 and could eat a box of dill pickle chips each night as a snack while never breaking 100lbs. Sigh.

I'm adding this picture of me on the day of my highschool graduation in 1992. I think pictures are fun to look at and this is me not breaking 100lbs while my exercise consisted of practicing for marching band and living on a diet of dill pickle chips and pop. That's my brother BTW. No my brother was not my date! I'm sure the parents made us take this photo. This is a rare photo because I'm actually smiling in it. Being a upper-middle class teenager is so hard.