Monday, January 21, 2008
I forgot
I logged into Share today and it just hit me that Evie's due date was yesterday. I actually thought about her at church because of all the pregnant women around but it didn't even occur to me what day it was. I don't know if I feel good or bad about it. I don't want to be defined by "anniversaries" but I don't want to forget either. She would have been a year old if she'd have been born on the 20th. I've been doing ok, at least a lot better than I was a year ago, but I do have times where I miss her so much. The girls were showering the other day, having a lot of fun and I thought about Evie being a year old and in there with them. They would have adored her. I still don't get it but I doubt I ever will. Kristin brought baby Audrey to our house at Christmas and Hanna was in love with her. She said "I wish Evie didn't die." Me too.
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6 comments:
I'm so sorry Shea! But i'm glad to hear you are feeling a bit better about it. That is such a devastating loss no one should ever have to endure.
Shea--
I'm so glad you are doing better. It's hard to keep going but we really don't have much choice, do we? JK It is nice to feel like we've made progress. Keep it up! LUISA
I don't think I would ever understand why something like that happened but I'm glad to hear you are doing a bit better anyway. I can't even imagine...
((HUGS))
While the pain never truly goes away, it is nice to know we can have some "good" days too. Evie will never be forgotten.
Me too, Shea. This post made me cry. Hanna and Grace would be amazing older sisters.
I am thinking of you and Evie.
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